Modern Day Slavery

I always assumed it still existed, but had no idea as to the extent of it. It is alive on every continent, and there are more slaves in the world today than ever. Slavery is horrific, and child slavery is so dark and evil it tests the limits of my faith. I started reading about the child sex trade in Vietnam/Cambodia from a book called: The Road of Lost Innocence by Somaly Mam. This began to draw my eyes toward adopting from that country, but because of various requirement it did not look like that was going to be an option. But the adoption agency that I had researched had just opened a branch into Haiti. This seemed to fit.


When people ask me how I knew where God was directing us, I tell them that it was and is a comfortable feeling. Like a puzzle piece that fits into place. It was very much the same thing with Konrad. The minute I saw Konrad in the hospital it was as if I had always known him. Sort of like playing hide and seek. I was seeking, and once I found him I said, "Oh, there you are." Nothing earth shattering and no lighting bolt from heaven. It just fits. But I must make it clear that A LOT of prayer goes into it before it happens.

Once my eyes were turned on Haiti I began to look a little closer at what they call "The Pearl of the Caribbean." An orientation opened my eyes to the unbelievable poverty and desperation of so many who live there. Parents line up outside of orphanages to hand there children off to someone who can feed them. They eat these little things called dirt biscuits which is a combination of a tiny little bit of flower, oil and dirt. People say there is no way to describe what you see when you are there. It will change you forever.

Where there is poverty like that, there is slavery. And when parents are desperate to feed their families they will hand over their children to unknown people who promise to care for them and send them to school. The promises are rarely fulfilled, and the children then become slaves and "partners". I am currently reading a book from Benjamin Skinner called A Crime So Monstrous. It is extremely hard to read, but very revealing.

But through all that darkness God still shines. I find it interesting that all four of us (myself, David, Konrad and Saxton) are all studying Exodus. This was not planned in any way. The boys are studying it in their Sunday school classes, David chose it on his own at the beginning of the summer and I joined a bible study at the last minute in another church. The cover of my bible study work book reads: Then, the Lord told him, "I have certainly seen the oppression of my people in Egypt. I have heard their cries of distress because of their harsh slave drivers. Yes, I am aware of their suffering. So I have come down to rescue them from the power of the Egyptians and lead them out of Egypt into their own fertile and spacious land. It is a land flowing with milk and honey."

What does God ask of us and how do we know?

This blog is designed to be an honest and heart felt journal of our journey to adopt from Haiti. It will be written from the heart. I will openly express my thoughts and fears without concern for political correctness, and I will not tip toe around the primary reason this whole thing began. God brought us here.

The journey began back in mid March of 2009 and I have my thoughts at the time written down on several legal pads strewn throughout the house. But this blog is designed to document my feelings, emotions and thoughts from this point on. I could spend a great deal of time writing down the past 6 months and everything that lead up to the decision to adopt from Haiti, but at least right now, it is not relevant for this purpose. It will come out in pieces as time goes by.

Our decision was not taken lightly, and many many hours of prayer and meditation have gone into moving forward. Why Haiti people ask. I barely even knew Haiti existed a year ago, much less what is going on there. We knew we wanted a girl, we knew that adoption was likely so I started checking into our options. The only way I can describe it is similar to what happens when you are in a conversation with someone and they glance over your shoulder. You follow their gaze with your own eyes. That is what the Holy Spirit did with me. I was gently shown the tiny country right off our shores, and the pure desperation and suffering of their children.

The only problem was that it was an INSANE thing to do. I created a list of 11 reasons why we should NOT adopt from Haiti.

*A child from a different race

*A country that seemed to be on the brink of collapse

*Absolutely NO money to do this and a cost of $28,000

*We would get an older baby - impossible to get a new born

*Malnutrition

*Up to a two year wait for a child

*The potential hardship on our sons

*The enormous amount of paperwork

*Impact on the extended family

*The aids epidemic

*A country that has its roots in vodou and black magic.

Why on earth would God take me there? (When I say me, I mean Shushawn - God started this process with me and I took it to David) So I began to pray and listen for God's voice through scripture. I read an awesome book called Hearing God. It helped a great deal. It is scary to feel this kind of direction and I was terrified I had self manufactured it. I decided to bury it, and pray that if it was self manufactured it would go away. I checked my motives daily. Trying to determine if it was my own selfish desire that wanted this. You can get a lot of "kudos" by taking in a "poor" child. People like that sort of thing. People do humanitarian work every day for purely selfish reasons. If this was the case I wanted nothing to do with it. God works in us to bring glory and honor to HIM not us. We are the vessels that he uses to reveal Himself to the world.

But no matter what, I could not bury it. The more I tried to bury it the more it seemed to want to come to the surface. Finally, I was so desperate to pray about it I decided to pray and just see how the Holy Spirit lead me. It was so powerful it scared me. Instead of praying for a child, I prayed for the child's mother. For the mother to be comforted, to be given the proper nutrition she needed. I felt a desperation there. A struggle for life. A love for this child that she could not fulfill for some reason. I cried and cried. I thought "there is something wrong with this mother." I prayed for her to feel the love and peace of God. And that is when I began to RUN.

There was nothing else I could do. I had not run for 20 years. But within a very short time I was running up to 7 miles. I ran and ran, and while I did I prayed that God would show this mother that someone was coming. Her child would be okay. Someone was coming.

I have no idea what this means, and I don't know if I will ever find out. But every time I try to turn away, Haiti is there. Every time I cry to God, saying "How do I know God? How do I know if you are in this?" He shows me what His love is and how Christ showed His love when He walked the earth. He shows me that He is the God of miracles. He is the everlasting God, maker of Heaven and Earth.

"But God, I'm scared..." "But God, we don't have the money..." "But God, what if it doesn't work..." "But God, what if people think we're crazy.." "But God, what if our families don't accept her....", and the list goes on and on.

The bottom line is that we don't have the money. David and I are going to put down $2,000. But once that is done the clock starts ticking, and we have no plan B. If the money isn't there then the file is closed. Why is it that I have so much trouble believing that God can provide that money when God has provided EVERYTHING else thus far.

70-80% of all Americans think about adoption at one time or another, but only 3 - 4% actually do it. The primary reason is the money. We will put our measly little $2,000 in and see where God takes it. It is completely out of our hands.